Breaking free

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted. But mostly they’re darked.
A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?

I took a gap year because I was afraid. Not of change, quite the opposite, actually, I was afraid that I’d settle into the same routine I had in high school, not having changed at all. In my heart I knew I had to get out there and learn – not from university, but from challenging myself. From the offset I was aware that I’d fall into a slump sooner or later, between jobs and travel. Well, here I am. I’m in a Slump.2b63260aa7d85dd8127cd08d02994927.png

I came to be here when I finished working at my temporary job a month ago. It was all going smoothly until then: I was saving, I was occupied, I was motivated. The job search that ensued was exhausting. The interviews. The waiting. I wasn’t having luck due to the fact that I’m leaving for Spain in less than two months – who’s going to hire someone for that long? The stress started to get to me and I started feeling myself getting into the Slump. It’s sticky and humid; here we go to bed at 2AM watching trashy shows and wake up at 11AM on a beautiful day with guilt hanging over us. When I’m stressed, my hormones get thrown off balance, meaning pimples, fatigue and terrible mood-swings. The Slump is an insidious place.

Somehow you’ll escape
all that waiting and staying
You’ll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.

With banner flip-flapping,
once more you’ll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you’re that kind of a guy!

I’ve had enough of being here. I don’t like it – nobody does. But the greatest risk of being here is getting accustomed to it, forgetting you’re there. Once you accept that nothing can change you’ll be stuck there for a very long time. They key to get out is doing small tasks, plucking things out of your head, where they get jumbled and complicated and distorted, and writing them down. Then, you write solutions. If you can do something about it, do it; if you can’t, then you accept it and move on. With each small thing accomplished, you get closer to finding your way out.

Little projects are important, so I’ve taken on a few: writing every day, updating this blog, learning new pieces on the piano, experimenting in the kitchen – it’s all helped me bring the structure and motivation I was missing. I’ve reminded myself of what I love doing and that I have so much to look forward to this year. Waking up early, making my bed and listening to music as I start my day also makes me feel like I’m going to get things done, and that nothing is a bad as it seems in the Slump. I had been doubting myself far too much, and it’s time for me to get back on track.

Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life’s
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never foget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

Like many of the challenges I’m to face this year, the Slump was one of them, and ultimately I’m glad I came here, because I’ve learned from it. And that is exactly what I set out to do.

10 thoughts on “Breaking free

  1. I completely understand how hard the job search is. I’m going through the same thing. It’s discouraging when you realize you’re putting all this effort in and you’re drained of so much motivation when you keep hearing the word “no” or aren’t even asked to come for an interview at all. A major reason I started my blog was to keep myself busy doing something I love so I’m with you on that! You’re not alone though and you will get through this ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much for your kind words! I’m sorry to hear you’re going through the same thing, but at least we’re in it together!! I hope you get through the “slump” too…❤️

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I am now 51 and finally love interviews. I used to train colleagues and friends on interview technique. It’s not easy, their are rules and games are played. But the best advice is research, research the employer..find interesting stuff that they don’t even know, ask for a drink at the interview…we all get thirsty, ask probing questions..afterall you want to know IF you want to work for them, enjoy the chance to chat and analyse your responses afterwards…how would you expect an employee to answer that question. If the question seemed irrelevant or plain stupid…tell them in a tactful way…that conversation might just take you on a different route and save the day. If the interview is getting out of your control and your just not happy..say so. If you don’t the interviewer will think your nervous, arrogant or just a weak individual. Come up with interesting questions…interviewing is boring and it’s nice to get some meat on the bone. Relax, breath, don’t fiddle, and yes you can wave your arms about if it helps the story. Finish sentences clearly. Don’t ramble. Pause briefly before answering to get the brain in gear. If you don’t get the question ask them to rephrase it. I could go on and on, but this is just a hi, hope that helps. Good luck. Slump phase..going through that myself. Blogging keeps me sane.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Judi!!!!! Thanks for sharing your advice, I really appreciate it since the job search is set to resume again when I get back from Europe… I never thought about it that way, that the interview goes both ways. I will try to take control of the situation! Sorry to hear you’re in a slump, I hope you’ll come though the other end smiling. Have a lovely week! 🙂


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